Emotionally Invest In Your Woman!

The more you build your woman up, the more valuable she will be in both your life and her life.

Often times men will mistake our request for support as being too emotional. Although, I believe that us women are emotional creatures, I do think that the words “too emotional” is used incorrectly.

When we are requesting support we are in need of words of affirmation, encouragement, or stimulation. Each day we step out into a world where black women have to work 10x harder than anyone else, feeling unappreciated. In the presence of our significant other, we would like to hear and feel POSITIVE VIBES ONLY!

Dwelling on the negative things about her will only cause her to feel like she isn’t good enough. Words have the ability to do a lot of harm to those whose love language is words of affirmation. Using poor choice of words and energy can lead into emotional wounds for her. This will cause her to have self-doubt, low self-esteem, depression which then will pour into your relationship that will eventually fail.

The quote “behind every great man is a great woman” was first used in the mid-1940s. The first printed citation of above quote stems from a male athlete referring to his wife. In order for him to perform, his wife needed to play her role in his life.

If he was breaking her down with negative comments I don’t believe she would be able to provide the necessary support he needed as a athletic.

Build her up! If you want your queen to hold you down, you will need to make sure that you’re contributing to her high self-esteem and self-confidence.

Ask yourself the question, If she questions her value in her self, how will she be of any value to you. A beautiful black woman with high self esteem and knows her self-worth is a powerful woman. It will take a strong man who is secure with himself to let her shine and provide “support” to her daily. Every king should have a strong QUEEN behind them!

What I Am Wearing

Top- H&M

Skirt- H&M

Shoes-Shoedazzle

Let It Go, Sis

“To let go does not mean to get rid of. To let go means to let be. When we let be with compassion, things come and go on their own.” –Jack Kornfield

Yes, we are all guilty of holding on to situations that we know we should release from. Whether we are holding on to a grudge, holding on to memories from a relationship or holding on to a negative experience that replays in our minds.

You have to understand that holding on does not change anything. Holding on to a situation will only hold you back from creating a strong sense of self.

One of the most difficult things for most people to let go of are relationships. Often times, we will turn into someone completely different when we don’t want to let go. We start to make poor choices, lie, or even bring negativity to not only yourself but the ones around you.

I remember holding on to a past relationship even after my heart was broken and the relationship was clearly over . I couldn’t even recognize myself when I looked in the mirror. I was angry all the time, stressed out and took my frustrations out on my loved ones.

The moment I recognized i was holding on to this relationship that was over, I started to “DO THE SELF-WORK.” First, I learned to accept that the relationship I thought I was suppose to be in forever is over. I began to move on and that is when my life started falling back into place for the good.

Although it can be difficult to let go of someone you’ve built a deep connection with, it is necessary to let go to live a great life.

The key to letting go is facing what has happened, accepting that you can’t change it and then moving on. 

What I Am Wearing:

Top- Wellington Mall

Cargo- Fashion Nova

Shoes- Ego

Clutch- Express

A Picture Perfect Birthday

Mood: It’s a celebration every time we link up 😝

If you’re like me, then you love love love birthdays. I love the entire process leading up to my birthday festivities.

From transforming with hair and make up, planning the festivities (my sister really plans it, lol), to inviting all of my close family friends to come and celebrate me. I love it all ! And yes I am very EMOTIONAL around my birthday. ♋️

This year was a tad bit different. Normally, I would travel to a location where 20-25 family and friends would meet me.

Or I would do a themed dinner party. But this year I decided to stay local and lowkey. Well I kind of lowkey. LOL

My sister, who’s always in charge of the planning committee, made reservation at Banko Cantina for tacos, margaritas, and whatever else that came with that night.

We did tacos because my birthday fell on a Tuesday…Taco Tuesday’s! Get it?! Lol

Everything was so perfect! Everyone came out and enjoyed the night. I am a firm believe of controlling your energy and who gets to invade your space.

The family and friends that attended had the perfect energy I needed. The love and support was so real!!

I’ve learn so much about myself in the last couple of months leading up to my birthday.

I realize I had to increase my self love, self affirmation, positive thinking, and my selfishness.

Yes, you read correctly. I had to put me first in all facets of my life. Love life, work life, family life, etc.

Best decision I ever could have made this year. I am so much more happier, stress free and just loving life.

This year I have to say my birthday was perfect. I’m in a good space mentally. I’m so excited for what’s to come.

Happy Birthday To Me !!

What I Am Wearing:

Corset- Fashion Nova

Jeans- H&M

Shoes- Ego

Hair Provided by, Colored By, Installed By-www.styleseat.com/kadiekay

Reset. Refocus. Reclaim.

I don’t know about you but every now and again I need to reset.

We tend to get caught up in familiar cycles, every day routines, and even the grind that we don’t realize that we are loosing ourselves and risking potential breakdowns during this thing called life.

For me, I realize I had to reset when my insomnia kicked in. I went 4 days straight with no sleep. I would just sit in the dark and think. Pretty scary, I know.

At this point, I had to make a decision on how I wanted to handle this. Do I go to a doctor and get a prescription for some sleep aid? or Do I do the self work to RESET, REFOCUS, AND RECLAIM myself.

Here are a few things I’ve done (in no particular order) to help me get back to myself:

1. TAKE A BREAK. It is OK to take a break from EVERYTHING. Give your mind a break from all productivity. Take some time away from work, family and kids. Head to a beach and just listen to the waves. No phone. No social media. Its just you and the ocean. Try to mediate if you can to clear your mind.

2. GET RID OF ANY STRESSFUL SITUATION. You should reevaluate all situations that’s going on in your life and remove anything that brings you more stress than happiness.

3. HAVE FUN. Get out and let your hair down. The great thing about living in Florida is we live where people come to vacation. Head south for a 1-2 day stay-cation and have a blast.

4. CHANGE YOUR SCENERY. Go to new places and meet new people. Some times just a change in your scenery can bring on such good vibes and energy that can inspire you to get back to yourself.

Doing any of the about steps can help you reset. The most important thing to do is to always put YOU first. From time to time I tend to forget that but with a quick RESET, I always bounce back. Love yourself enough to do the work so that you can get back to being the best version of yourself.

I’m happy to say I have RESET MY MIND. REFOCUS ON MYSELF. RECLAIM MY HAPPINESS.

What I Am Wearing:

Shirt- Express

Jean Shorts- Cut by me

Shoes- Justfab

Handbag- Justfab

Look Good To Feel Good..

Its not just an old cliche, looking good can actually improve your mood and make you healthier…

You’d be surprised how a hot shower, a nice outfit, and a full face of makeup can make you feel a hundred times better when you’re under the weather. A few months ago, I caught the flu and was feeling down for what felt like an eternity. I’d finally had enough and decided to get out of bed to pamper myself with lashes, make up and a brand new outfit. It was the exact medicine I needed; my energy, confidence, and more importantly my health went up that day!

One organization dedicated to this philosophy is Look Good, Feel Better. Since 1989 they have worked with people who are battling cancer to encourage and inspire them. With the help of thousands of volunteers, they organize makeovers, workshops, and more to support women.

When I’m feeling down, it’s so tempting to give in to the cozy comfort of a pair of sweats, a Netflix series I haven’t binged yet, and some snacks I’ll have no guilt indulging in. But with so many responsibilities in a day, I usually don’t get my fill of relaxation. Sometimes a little makeover is exactly what it takes to get me feeling back to normal. 

What I Am Wearing:

Top: H&M

Bottom: H&M

Jeans Jacket: American Eagle ( cut & destroyed by me)

Shades: Express

Accessories: Aldo

Shoes: Ego

 

 

 

Look Good To Feel Good..